An important conversation is unfolding in the yoga world. And it’s about time. On the heels of the #metoo movement many women are speaking up (and some have been for quite a while) about being wrongly touched, being made to feel incredibly uncomfortable, or straight up sexually violated or harmed at the hands of a trusted yoga teacher.
The conversation has so many layers. There are the egregious violations perpetrated by (primarily) male yoga teachers, often highly regarded gurus (don’t even get me started on what I think about that word, especially in this context) against (primarily) female students. And then there is a more nuanced discussion about whether or not an adjustment of any kind should be allowed without consent.
I believe what we are learning is this: WE MUST GET CONSENT. For all of it.
If there is even a hint of a possibility that my, as yoga teacher, touching you could take you out of your practice in any way (at the minimum be a distraction and at worst trigger a traumatic memory) then why on earth would I ever put my desire to do an adjustment over your need to feel safe? I wouldn’t.
The conversation is changing and so must we. If there is even a hint of a possibility that we could create harm of any kind, then we must err on the side of absolute caution. Ahimsa, doing no harm, is one of the primary tenets of yoga philosophy. As is svadiyaya, self study, It appears we all have deeper layers of svadiyaya to explore.
If any teacher feels defensive or threatened by this ensuing conversation, that suggests they have some inner work to do.
I personally love receiving adjustments from my teachers (whom I thoughtfully choose, trust and admire) and I love giving adjustments to my students. At no time do I use physical adjustments as a crutch in lieu of being able to articulate what I am teaching through my words. I could absolutely teach a smart, thorough class without ever touching a student. But for many of us we appreciate some hands on touch from our teachers when done thoughtfully and well. In our ever disconnected world, often times a loving personal touch in a yoga class can be profound. Many times a quick touch can keep a student’s body safe from injury or inform a student the part of their body they are trying to access. Could these adjustments be done verbally? Yes. And then there are the feel good adjustments - a loving touch to the lower back in child’s pose, a lift of the hips in downdog, a savasana adjustment. These are not corrective, but rather they can create ease and space in an already beautiful asana. But not for everyone, and that is what we need to be willing to discover.
Some adjustments have to go. Their day is done. For example, there is no reason a male teacher needs to “deepen” a female student’s stretch in happy baby. There is no legitimate reason to place your hands anywhere near a woman’s chest or pelvis. And if you have seen any recent footage of the so-called adjustments by Patabi Jois, well, they speak for themselves. They appear to be a ruse so that he can mount a student and grope and grind a student who has put herself in his trusted care. Pushing someone in any way becomes a violent act when it takes them further than their body wants or needs to go. And even if their body is okay with it, maybe they aren’t.
We as teachers, especially male teachers, need to understand that any perceived or real power differential is not a thing to be exploited. Period. You are not the shit because you are a yoga teacher. Neither am I. Our job is to create a safe space and container for students to have their own transformational experience. We are not the reason they expand and grow. They are.
In my over twenty years as a yoga student, I have only been in a handful of classes where I have either walked out (only once) or vowed never to return. I made these decisions after experiencing what I perceived to be a male teacher on a power trip. I could hear sarcasm, ridicule or shame targeting his students, and I knew right then and there, this is not a person I want to learn from. That was it. I left.
But not everybody does. The lines of trust become blurred.
I remain dumbfounded that anyone still practices or affiliates themselves with anything Bikram related after so many allegations of rape, sexual misconduct and just straight up assholedry. And if I see another #practiceandalliscoming quote after what we are learning about Patabi Jois, I may just throw up on my smart phone. Perhaps some of these men are considered by some to be the godfathers of yoga, but to me, they appear to be deeply fallible men with gigantic egos on a power trip and perpetrators of sexual violence.
Am I leaning way into judgment? Absolutely. Is my judgment of others a character defect I should explore? Probably. But I will never stop judging a human who takes advantage of their position by harming someone who has put their trust in them. There is no world where I will ever agree that the bravado and free licence certain teachers take to manipulate another person’s body without freely given consent is ok. It just isn’t.
Being a yoga teacher is not free license to touch whomever you want however you want.
That said, I am fortunate to work with many incredible male teachers who take their role seriously and are committed to their craft. Being an asshole is not the norm, but the few bad apples out there are bringing to light deeper questions.
Even for those of us who have very clean and clear intentions, is there a need to ask consent?
Yes.
While I know my energy is clean and my intentions are always good, what I do not know is how my students feel or what life experience they are bringing into the room, whether a preexisting injury, life trauma, or just a straight up desire not to be touched.
It is none of my business, unless they want to share it, why a student does not want to be adjusted. But it is my business to get consent.
If anyone wants to take this conversation further or let me know if you do not want adjustments, please reach out (and, yes, I know that most of you love them).
With love always,
Jocelyn